Being seen: People of Boston
At 15, I first encountered Humans of New York. It was a shocking experience. Brandon Stanton, a seemingly regular dude, was approaching strangers on the New York City streets, asking them questions and taking their pictures. More than his courage, I was impressed that people said yes to his requests.
I needed to try it out for myself. There was already a Humans of Boston, so I settled for People of Boston. On March 19, 2013, I uploaded my first photo. Over the course of 18 months, I met hundreds more strangers, documenting in a single frame a moment in their lives. Among other things, I learned about depression, companionship, and curiosity about inner experience.
And in between mentions of former lovers and crackling laughter, I merited to witness humanity.
One of my favorite’s was Maddie. She worked in a retirement home, and regaled me with tales of the elderly’s youth. Another guy described coming out as gay to his parents.
One day, someone messaged me:
Heyo - I hope this message finds you well!
A few months ago (March 30th to be exact) you approached two people sitting by a tree in the Boston Common and asked to take a picture of them! While you didn't choose the picture for your project, I'm still hoping it's somewhere safe in your archives because you caught a very special moment for me. If you backtrack to March 30th, you'll see a guy and a gal casually reading Game of Thrones in peaceful silence—on a first date.
I've since finished book 3 and am well into book 4, but more importantly, I've been dating my boyfriend Paul ever since. We're heading towards the 6 month mark of our relationship, and I'd really love to see the awkward, fresh and unique moment you captured! It's been a while, so I'm well aware the photo might be lost in macbook trashland - but if you still have it, I would very much appreciate you sending it my way :)
I uploaded it here. How cool, right?! To have your first date—a time too awkward and early to take a selfie—captured by a total stranger.
Still, it bugged me. I didn’t understand why people would reveal themselves to a total stranger.
One possible answer comes from a recent piece by Rabbi Dovid Bashevkin: To be seen—to fulfill our innate desire (or need) to be witnessed, so that our existence is validated. To be affirmed by the universe: you are not alone, not acting in a vacuum. You will be missed when you are gone.
Maybe that’s why Nick and Soraya and Kate and Claire and so many others let this scrawny 16 year-old take their picture.